One of my best friends posted this on Facebook a few days ago and it really hit me. She is my friend who has been through more in her life than anyone else I know and yet she is always encouraging others. She is always smiling and her faith is strong and rock solid. She is a single working mom who has a son with spina bifida. She was in a bad marriage, got out, put herself through nursing school, and all while raising 2 kids; the youngest of which is totally dependent on her. Donna and I met at Canine Companions for Independence. She and her son Andrew were there getting him a service dog and we were there getting Henny for Hannah. Donna and I had an instant connection. It was like we had been friends forever. Our sense of humor was the same, our likes, our faith, our political views (ha). She and Dennis even hit it off all because of their love for Andy Griffith and Arnold Palmers! If I had ever had a twin sister, Donna would be that twin! She is probably one of my biggest supporters and most faithful encouragers! All she goes through and she is always worried about me.
When she posted this picture on FB it penetrated my heart and soul. It is so true. My life, the one I thought I would have (the one I planned without asking God what His plan was) looked so much different from the life I live now. In some ways it was like a death. The death of hopes and dreams of the life that I thought I would live. Once you grieve that death then you start back with the life you have been given; the journey you have been asked to walk. It isn’t always easy but you have to let go of and grieve what you thought your life would be so you are able to move forward with the life and journey God gave you.
This week has been difficult for me (for many reasons); but when Donna posted this it reminded me that I can still get my life back, it is just not what I thought it would be or look like and that is okay. I keep reminding myself that one day none of this earthly stuff is going to matter……Heaven will be perfect and as Hannah prays every night there will be “no more night, no more sorrow, no more pain, no more sickness, no more death and HAPPY all the time.”
As I was typing this, I got a text from my friend Donna and she is actually in the hospital right now with chest pains and having a heart cath this morning. Please pray for her. She had a heart attack and open heart surgery 2 years ago so I know she is scared and worried, as am I. I wish I lived closer to help her, but unfortunately she is in Alabama and I am in Florida.
If you are struggling, like so many people do around the holidays, you aren’t alone. I get it. I tend to struggle around Thanksgiving and Christmas myself. I love this time of year…..but in my world it isn’t what I wished or dreamed it would be like once I had Hannah…..with her complex medical issues, life isn’t what we had hoped for especially during the holidays. We make it work, but there is some sadness and grief in the air. Just know you aren’t alone. Know that it is okay not to be okay. Grieve the life you thought you would have but remember to pick up the pieces and move forward with the life you were given. I promise you aren’t alone and someone out there is struggling right along with you.
Until next time……..