I saw this yesterday on an Instagram post and it hit me.  True kindness is THIS!  Encouraging someone, loaning your strength (even while facing your own difficult circumstances) to someone else who is battling their own problems in life.  This is not only kindness, but grace and true friendship.

I have a handful of friends who have done this for me; those friendships are people who are in their own pits of despair; fighting their own battles….some worse than I could ever imagine and yet… they are for me loaning me their strength and never once reminding me of my weaknesses.  I am my own worst critic. I know my weaknesses.  I battle my internal demons constantly (yes I have them).  But these few friends, know my demons and never point them out to me or cause more discouragement or discontentment in my life.  Just the opposite, through their own grief, demons, problems and challenges they lift me up, help me fight and give me the strength to press on.

Sometimes it comes in the form of a text message.  Sometimes a card in the mail.  Sometimes a comment on Facebook.  Sometimes a phone call.  Sometimes, on the rare occasion I see someone that truly loves me, it comes in the form of a hug (even though I am not much of a hugger).

The last few years I have heard a lot about bullying……why?  Why can’t people chose kindness?  Why even at my age do I still see “friendship cliques?”  That is baffling to me…..why can’t we chose kindness to everyone we come in contact with?  Why are people so mean?  I know evil exists in this world but there are so many people who aren’t evil that still don’t show kindness to everyone.  It is so disheartening.   I have a friend who posted on FB this week that her daughter has been horrifically bullied at school.  Kids can be so mean if they choose to be.  They judge other kids by their haircuts, the way they wear makeup, the clothes they wear and the car they drive.  I told Dennis just yesterday that I am so glad Hannah isn’t in school sometimes…..she is safe here at home with me; away from anyone having the chance to bully her.  I know I have shared on my blog before about the little 5-year-old girl who bullied Hannah at CHURCH of all places.  I don’t know why it shocked me because let’s be honest some of the most judgmental and mean people go to church.  But, when it happened to Hannah I was mortified.  Fortunately, Hannah was oblivious to the little bully but I wasn’t.  It did something to me… first it shocked me, then shattered my heart, then it made me really angry.  So angry in fact that stepping foot in church because of that incident was very difficult for me after that.  That was 8 years ago, and of course the last 5 years I haven’t been able to go to church due to Hannah’s illness and lack of an immune system but prior to that between her being bullied and a few other incidences that happened I lost all desire to go.  Now, before you get all “judgey” on me…..I don’t hold the “church” responsible for the actions of a few.  I worked through that anger but I would still be extremely cautious if I could go back to church in regards to Hannah and myself.  Of course, that doesn’t look like it will be happening anytime soon, so I guess we are safe!  HA!

I have learned over the past 5 years to be an introvert and now the world and places are too “peopley” for me.  I have learned to keep things to myself and be content with myself……that is a huge accomplishment for me as I used to have to be surrounded by people.  Now, being alone is welcomed.  It is lonely at times but if you don’t surround yourself with people then you can’t get hurt, right?  So, my circle is very small and years ago that would not have been okay with me……now it is.  I am thankful for my circle… people…..because the people I have chosen to surround myself with are true, loyal and KIND!  The older I get that is all I want from those I surround myself with.  We all have battles we are facing.  I truly think that no one on earth is without some kind of struggle in life.  If you are then you should count your blessings that your life is perfect.  My people have big issues…..problems…..struggles…..challenges…..but wow….the way they love me through their own problems is exactly how I hope I love them and others through theirs.

Until next time……..


One thought on “Kindness


    Beautifully said.  Love you and your family, dear lady.  You set a lofty example of the rest of us to aspire to reach and I have great admiration for you and for Dennis. Just keep doing what you’re doing. Hugs and Blessings, Brenda Singletary

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